My First (& Last) Au Pair Experience

Reflecting on my au pair experience in France -- What I learned and why I left early

Mar 13, 2025

I wanted to spend the winter skiing without spending a fortune so the idea of becoming an au pair seemed like the perfect hack. No crazy resort fees, a chance to live like a local in Europe, and plenty of time to hit the slopes. However, I ended up leaving two weeks early because the experience was different than what I had expected. That was my first and last time being an au pair.

How I Ended Up as an Au Pair

Mid-2024, I was trying to figure out how to ski most of the winter without draining my bank account. Working at a mountain was my first thought, but with only 2.5 months free and the whole visa headache for Americans in Europe, I needed a Plan B.

I used Workaway to find some volunteering opportunities that were near a ski mountain. I ended up finding a few different au pair gigs in Europe and settled on a French family looking for an English-speaking au pair for their two girls. The process was pretty straightforward – messaged through Workaway, chatted on WhatsApp, jumped on a video call with the mom, then another with the whole family. Before I knew it, we aligned on the dates, I'd booked flights, and they'd hooked me up with a ski pass for their local mountain.

In exchange for watching their two daughters and helping out around the house, I got a private room, food, and access to their local ski mountain. It wasn’t my first Workaway experience, but it was my first time as an au pair. My main motivation? Snowboarding. Everything else seemed manageable.

My Responsibilities

Real talk – my responsibilities weren't that intense. Twice a week, I got the girls ready in the morning, walked them to the bus stop, and picked them up after school. Then I’d hang out with them, make dinner, and get them ready for bed.

I'd also cover random mornings or evenings when the parents had things going on, and most nights I'd spend a couple hours playing with the girls, helping with dinner, or getting them ready for bed. Throw in some basic housework (vacuuming, trash duty, dishwasher loading), and that was pretty much it.

For what I was getting in return, it was a great deal. If I were younger and the snow had been better, it would’ve been the perfect opportunity (more on that later).

Why I Left Early

I was supposed to stay until mid-March but ended up leaving at the end of February. Here’s why:

1. Turns Out I Don't Want to Take Care of Kids

The girls were cute and pretty independent, but at the end of the day, they were still kids. That meant backtalk, sibling fights, and not always listening. I realized I have zero interest in looking after children. There's a huge difference between thinking kids are fun and actually being in charge of them. I already knew I didn’t want kids but this further confirmed that.

2. The Snow was TERRIBLE

Let's be real, the main reason I signed up for this gig was for unlimited mountain access. This was my biggest disappointment. The region had an exceptionally dry winter — only two powder days and even then, I scraped up the bottom of my board on rocks. I only went to the mountain 8 times over the 2 months and twice I came back after just two runs because it was that bad.

3. Living in Someone Else's Space

Despite having my own bedroom and bathroom, I never felt 100% comfortable. I was constantly aware that I was in someone else's house, following their rules and routines. Small things would happen – stuff that seemed totally normal to me would trigger these direct (sometimes cold or passive-aggressive) comments from the mom. The French communication style often left me feeling like I was walking on eggshells in what was supposed to be my temporary home.

4. Terrible Wifi & Signal

This might sound like a first-world problem, but when both the wifi and cell service suck, and you can't ski, it gets old real quick. I'd planned to use my downtime to work on some business projects, but the internet was so unreliable (especially when the parents were home) that I couldn't get anything done. I often had to go into town and pay for coworking just to be productive.

5. Zero Social Life

Living in a tiny French town without speaking the language meant I was pretty much on my own. I met a few younger people on the bus or mountain, but never clicked with anyone. Outside of family time, I had literally no social life, which made everything feel even more isolating.

Final Reflection

Looking back, I can see that au pairing probably works great for someone younger who's just trying to travel on the cheap. But in my thirties, I've hit a point where I want my own space and don't want to feel awkward in my living situation or have someone telling me what to do.

Even though the work wasn't crazy demanding, the whole experience felt like I was just killing time. At this point in my life, I want my time to be valuable — either fun, productive or ideally both. Watching kids wasn’t fulfilling or enjoyable for me, and since I couldn’t even ski, I was just counting down the days until I could leave.

To be fair, the family was perfectly nice and the work exchange was reasonable. My decision to bounce early wasn't about them – it was about realizing that this setup just wasn't working for me at this stage of my life. I learned that being an au pair isn’t for me so this was my first and last time (& that’s okay!).

Advice for Future Au Pairs

Being an au pair can be a great experience! You get to live in a new place, get something in exchange, learn a new language, and if you find the right family, it can be really rewarding.

If you're considering becoming an au pair, consider the following:

Be honest about why you're doing it: If your main reason is something specific (like skiing in my case), make sure that's actually going to pan out.
Think about the location: Is it a place where you'll be happy? City vs. middle of nowhere makes a huge difference in your daily life.
Kid age matters: Really think about how old the kids are and what that means for your day-to-day.
Get the details on your duties: Make sure you know exactly what you're signing up for.
Know yourself: Just because you think kids are cute doesn't mean you want to be responsible for them. Be brutally honest with yourself about your patience level.

My brief au pair chapter is ending earlier than planned, but sometimes the most valuable thing you get from an experience is figuring out what you definitely DON'T want – and I now know with 100% certainty that au pairing isn't for me.